Tag Archives: relationships

The Tragedy Of Unanswered Letters «Catching Up with A Shade Of Pen

A journey of exploration of my ownself and yours as well!

The Tragedy Of Unanswered Letters

I loved writing this with Alex- The Blue Eyed
(Lol, I can’t get the color of his eyes out of my mind).
You must read his wonderful poems. I loved a lot of his lines that he penned here.
It’s been endless years since I wrote to you
It’s been forever since I waited for your reply
And yet, every day when the sun rises;
My eyes gleam with the hope to hear from you
And yet, every night when the moon glitters
A silent tear slowly escapes as I still wait
unanswered letters
The tears of the lonely show life in its glory
An eternity alone, a devastating story
At the surface it may appear that we’re gone
But we’ve been silently waiting here all along
On the surface you may see what you will
But deep underneath the tears eat their fillThe heart though broken sings a song
Despite the wait, it hungrily longs
To belong to the one for whom it still beats
And yet Destiny plays foul and doesn’t permits
Two long lost lovers to unite again
As each suffers silently in unfulfilled love’s laneTo rise above passion and beauty skin deep
And transcend differences and secrets they keep
Reaching forever for one combined goal
Sticking together, two halves of a whole
A fixture of time, steadfast it remains
Love breaks down borders and releases the pain.


The Tragedy Of Unanswered Letters « A Shade Of Pen.


Count Marulo’s Estate 11 – Rosas Spinis. |Catching Up with charlotte carrendar

Weaving Words in her Web~

Count Marulo’s Estate (11) – Rosas Spinis.

Re: {RP} Count Marulo’s Estate
November 01, 2013 08:49PM

Holding her tight to his form, he smiled down at her, when Elvira said she would go where ever he went. Their union was such that they could not live without the other, and so it was only fitting that they became Husband and Wife, to seal that for society. Even the dark creatures have such rites. The Count had been thinking of a small country chapel, far away from the hustle and bustle of the city and the well to do estates. He actually delighted in perhaps doing something daring, like sharing their first night in a quaint inn, somewhere off the beaten track, far from prying eyes. To him it was a fanciful notion, and he felt that the privacy that they would enjoy would only heighten the pleasure of the experience.

“I shall promise you…a sweet chapel, and a wedding bed that is showered in rose petals, with fine wine and of course a bath in the room. You know how I love to watch you bathe.” Virgo said with a light chuckle. The more he thought about this, the more he liked the idea. “Did you wish to ask perhaps for someone…ooo like Sally to be your bridesmaid?’ It was an interesting idea, and he did wonder what she would say.

For MORE CLICK HERE Count Marulo’s Estate 11 – Rosas Spinis. | charlottecarrendar.


Love Is………. |CUP with helen midgley

Love Is……….

Posted by helen midgley on September 29, 2013


(Image from

Love is the touch that renders me still,

And Love is the hunger that I cannot fill,

Love is the kindling that feeds a wild fire,

And Love is the flame that reaches up higher.

Love is the scent of an apple blossom tree,

And love is the flower that you open in me,

Love is the daisy that is linked by a chain,

And love is the sunshine that comes before rain.

Love is the breath that is whispered on skin,

And love is the blood that simmers within,

Love is the heat of the passion beneath,

And love is the wanting that I cannot sheath.

Love is the melee that rages for peace,

And love is the prisoner that yearns for release,

Love is the conflict that fights as we mate,

And love is the soldier whose battle I sate.

Love is the essence of all that we share,

And love is my reason to think that you care,

Love is the words that still lay unspoken,

And love is the wish for just a small token.

Love is the ache that I carry inside,

And love is the struggle I have with my pride.

Love is the one thing I know you won’t give,

And love is the reason that makes me forgive.

via Love Is………. | helen midgley.

a 20 something who likes to #think, #care and #share. |Welcome to a new friend: Thinking About Living

Thoughts and Ideas about life.

I am a 20 something year old human who likes to think, care and share. So I decided to make this blog.

Here you will find ideas to stimulate your thinking about life and living.

  • Random stuff written be me.
  • Links to thought-provoking videos and articles.
  • Book recommendations.
  • Nice Quotes.

Please share your comments and opinions. If you have the audacity to try making friends with random people on the internet – feel free to contact me with the contact form. I would love to hear from you! 🙂

via About | Thinking About Living.

I am Writing a Story

I am writing a story.

I am writing the greatest story I can.

I am writing the story of my life.

This is Water by David Foster Wallace

A brilliant speech by David Foster Wallace. He discusses empathy as a way of life, to get out of being stuck in your own head. To being aware of the beauty of the human experience and connect with others.

Our reality is based on how we interpret and give meaning to things. But this is a choice that we can make – we can choose our own reality.

I highly recommend reading the full transcript rather than just watching the video.

TRANSCRIPT – Thanks to “Intelligent Life”

I have traveled a lot the past 3 years since graduating university. My employer has allowed me to live and work in a variety of locations internationally.

In each place I have had to find and make new friends and after all this time have become quite good at it. I am very selective with people I choose as friends. I only want genuine, kind people who are able to discuss challenging topics with a rational and nuanced perspective. These people are quite rare.

I have grown tired of frequently changing my location and losing my connections – keeping in touch through the internet just isn’t as fulfilling. So I am moving to London soon where I intend to stay for a few years at least.

These are some of the methods I will use to meet some great people:

  1. Couch Surfing – I have made a lot of my absolute best friends here in the last year. It is a great site filled with travelers that you can meet in your local area. I primarily use this to find people who I might become good friends with. There are usually weekly meetings and other events and most people are not averse to meeting up from a direct message. I have hosted once but not used it to surf while travelling.
  2. – I haven’t used this one much as there aren’t many events in my current city. But it seems to have a lot of cool events, especially in larger cities.
  3. Dating sites. eg. – Made some really amazing friends through this, doesn’t need to be used just for dating.
  4. Volunteering. – I plan on combining my passions of education and coaching to do some mentoring with school kids, preferably ones that need it the most. You can meet all sorts of Altruistic, like-minded people through volunteer organizations.

You have to be persistent. You have to be confident enough to single out people who interest you and to engage them in a one to one situation where you can really get to know each other through deep, meaningful and open conversation.

Whether you are moving to a new city or just want to upgrade your current social circles, give it a go!

What 55+ Year Olds Can Teach the Rest of Us about Happiness |Catching up with The Happsters

[Terry: I’m just wondering what they can teach a 60+ Grumpy Old Man, but that’s just me.]


What 55+ Year Olds Can Teach Us About Happiness

A recent study found that people over the age of 55 tend to be happier than any other age group. So what can the rest of us learn from them?

1. Stress Less

hamock catSource

A lot of us have jobs that lend themselves to stressing too much and playing too little. Do yourself a favor and don’t take yourself (or your work) so seriously. Of course, you still need to work hard, but take time to not only enjoy what you’re doing, but also take breaks when you feel overwhelmed. Go for a short walk outside or talk to a friend. Many people over the age of 55 are near retirement and have learned to not stress over work issues and are happier for it!

2. Smile More

What 55+ Year Olds Can Teach Us About HappinessSource

Did you know that those aged 35 to 44 smile less than any other age group? Shockingly, 5% of people in that age group admit that they never smile! Can you imagine not ever cracking a smile? More than 50% of those over 55, however, smile more than 10 times a day. As I mentioned in this post, smiling can reduce blood pressure, release endorphins, and is actually contagious! So if all else fails, surround yourself with happy people!

I’ll leave you with some great advice from a few happy seniors:

Find Joy in the OrdinarySource

“You are not responsible for all the things that happen to you, but you are completely in control of your attitude and your reactions to them.” ~ A 75-year-old man

“Adopt a policy of being joyful.” ~ A 84-year-old man

“I learned to be grateful for what I have, and no longer bemoan what I don’t have or can’t do.” ~ A 90-year-old woman

What age do you think you were the happiest? Do you think you’ve gotten happier as you’ve gotten older?

via What 55+ Year Olds Can Teach the Rest of Us about Happiness | The Happsters.

sweetheart rewrite COMBINE Buy Anything & Help Hey Sweetheart Stay Alive

It’s been WAY too long since we Caught up withTheReporterandTheGirlMINUSTheSuperman!

And the heart grows….Stronger



Defined as a sensation by many
Instilled as expectations long ago
Internal? Otherwise fatherly/motherly
Arriving on a whim when the right person appears
Expecting a feeling to erase all our unspoken fears
Emotionally, physically, magically, spontaneously degenerates
As easy as you fell in
Spontaneously, magically fall out
Hocus pocus when the pixie dust is gone
there appears all the wrongs
Slight of hand slight of heart
Tremendous hopes and expectations
Consequence of your heart’s misconception
Is that the love you have for me?
Shallow as your eyes can see?
My love deeper and lasting
Your goodness appreciating
My love is a choice (first)
Dealing for better or worst
Focus rooted in the good in you
Investing in you part of me giving
In the emotional times when we are low
Indecision to stay or go
In at its lowest always grow
Looking for the good in you
Loving you as God intended
This is not a magical feeling
Or whimsical affection
It did not just happen
Created over time without ballooning expectation
How can I so easily say…still
Because my love is not a feeling nor a magic sensation
It is loves true definition
Of you to me


So these are honest words written by a man who is also learning about love’s true meaning. I was talking with the poet about the changes he experienced after the dissolution of his marriage. He doesn’t hate his ex, he wishes the best for her; forgives her and is living in a new chapter. And the reason he is able to turn the page, is because he is experiencing love’s true meaning.

Because when you have love, you can’t hate the people who wronged you. Even those who betrayed your deepest trust. I know this is true, because the opposite of love is not hate. It’s indifference. It’s when you can truly forgive that person, you can move on.

Though the circumstances are different, I wonder why I seem to have trouble with that last step of forgiving and moving on? Everyday, things are getting better and I try to stay positive and appreciate things more; little things no longer seem little -like someone smiling or saying “Good morning” to you. But I can’t help waving from blame to disappointment or anger over the way Jon exploited me.

And other times he doesn’t cross my mind, or I don’t feel anything when I think of him. I don’t want to date again despite everyone else telling me to…and even trying to hook me up (that’s a post for next week); but it’s hard forgiving someone who callously uses others for his own benefit.

But all in good time. Moving on is different for everyone, and the steps aren’t laid out like a map.

One year ago this month, I experienced something that I never felt. I was in love: meaning that for first time I gave love and saw someone in his purest form and I still loved him. And it takes courage and inner strength to give that to someone. Especially someone who may not deserve it.

Now I’m not with that person, not because I stopped loving him; but because I realize that he did not feel the same way or is unwilling to give back. Thus he would hurt me more if I stayed. My love has changed over the course of time, and it may not go away.

Maybe for men it’s different. And I would like to hear more from male readers. Even though the poet and I talked on legnth about this topic, I know men are wired differently and may not experience the same love in every relationship and moving on is different from them.

In fact, he remarked, “A man wants to marry a woman who loves him more than he loves her.”

Me: “What?!”

“Because a guy is anticipating messing up.” And as women, if we love…we’re loyal enough to overlook it or forgive.

What is your true definition of love?

via And the heart grows….Stronger | TheReporterandTheGirlMINUSTheSuperman!.

“thanking the heavens that she was granted another morning.”| Catching up with Flux and Flow

Café Writing: False Realities

Posted on July 29, 2013 by jasminekeclipse


Tightly knit quilts woven together with yarn and ribbon, christened with bows and lace, draped over wooden banisters, sunshine bleeds under the doorway. Morning light kisses her cheeks and her tiny mouth forms into a blissful grin, happy to see another day. With the slightest sound, her mother graces the room with her presence and scoops her angel up in her arms, embracing her heartbeat and thanking the heavens that she was granted another morning. Love and laughter only last for so long in this home pained by timid smiles.

Men, women and children fill the home during the early hours of the morning in fear that their angel wouldn’t awaken, and when she was carried into the kitchen by her mother tears fell to the floor and gasps broke the silence, bringing light into the home once more.


In the fall, Jackie runs for the school’s track team and volunteers with the local theater. Her soft skin and black hair have grown with her nearly 18-year-old eyes, her eyes which have seen more pain than the normal human being. Shortly after her birth, her mother disappeared and her father took their family to England where they would spend the rest of her adolescent years until returning home. Jackie’s dark eyes held love and wisdom and thoughts that she chose to share with a select group of people. Blessings and remarks. Traveling to hell and back on numerous occasions, her heart had been torn and mended, friendships made and broken, hair dyed and shoes scuffed, her mind jumbled.

Drastic peace and plastic burdens.

In the summer we lost touch, we hadn’t lost our friendship, though.  She had just left everyone and everything, she left herself. Her eyes had closed infinitely, her heart of gold refused to pump blood through those angelic veins. The angel who had brought so much happiness and love into the lives of many had left the earth, ascending, falling in reverse, crashing. Failures do not welcome themselves into the realm of success. Angels belong in heaven. I suppose that is why she had left us.

via Café Writing: False Realities | Flux and Flow.

the sound of rushed heartbeats. Lost in each other’s eyes.| Poetry on a Roll

Layers Of Love


The blistering burn
that aches and aches.

Craving slight touches.
Whispering sweet words in ears.
Random kisses.
Hugs in abundance.
Regular phone calls.
Spontaneous texts.
Honest conversations.
Sweet sensations on and off the court.
Short hand-written notes
or long love letters.

Sincere appreciation.
Acceptance without question.
Showing understanding.
Giving simple gifts.
The spectacular sound of laughter.
Holding tingling hands,
fingers entwined.
Cuddling in bed.
Just the sound of rushed heartbeats.
Lost in each other’s eyes.

Copyright © 2013 Kimalee Jones

via Layers Of Love | Poetry on a Roll.

Sky View Wedding |Catching up with You By My Side

You By My Side~ -Eat, Love and Travel –

Prince Hotel Shin Yokohama: Sky View Wedding | You By My Side.

Prince Hotel in Shin Yokohama is one of the top ten places on my list of places to have a wedding. I just received the newest brochure of this place and… I still feel this place is top ten because it has this clean and simple look. You may have remember that M and I are both looking for  a place with white chapel… white and clean look.  This church is not surrounded by sea but as you can see from the title of this post, you can see sky from this chapel and reception area located at the top part of hotel.  I am not completely sure where it is located exactly but from the pictures, this place could be our potential place for wedding. But before we decide on where to have wedding, our parents have to have dinner to talk about our future.  Wish us luck~!

via Prince Hotel Shin Yokohama: Sky View Wedding | You By My Side.

10 Pictures That Will Make You Believe Happily Ever after Exists | The Happsters

10 Pictures That Will Make You Believe Happily Ever after Exists

Posted on July 16, 2013 by happsters

Do you believe that love can last forever? These photos depict older couples who are completely in love, happy as can be and still having tons of fun!

1. Strolling around

seeing old people in love

2. Making each other laugh

Older couple laughing

3. Combining hammocks and kisses

Hammocks & Old Couples

4. Holding hands


via 10 Pictures That Will Make You Believe Happily Ever after Exists | The Happsters.

Hey Sweetheart We Get Rewrites

Welcome to a new friend: kceddz | Words unspoken.

Words unspoken.

The voice rambling in my head.

Just putting it out there…

I’m really grateful there are no mind readers.

Or are there? *Dramatic close up*

A misfit

She sat all alone on the old wavering bench behind the building where she now lives, and took a deep breath. The sky was turning gray, heavy with clouds waiting to be spilled, and the wind was blowing stronger by the minute. Perfect. This means she’ll have the park to herself.
This place has become her hiding spot, where she’d run away from too much social interaction.
Though she didn’t understand how it was always so empty, does no one else in the whole dorm like to come here? Even though the place is ruins, it’s still a beautiful scene. Seems like the others don’t have a problem in being surrounded by people all day long, don’t they get tired?
She feels exhausted just spending her classes with people.
Ahh, she thought coming to university would change everything, but let’s face it; once a misfit, always a misfit. And here it seems even more obvious that she doesn’t get along with her “friends”. It’s like she’s on a whole different frequency than every body else.
Oh well, that’s fine really. She likes being alone for a while, listening to music none of her friends listens to and reading books they would never read.

via A misfit | Words unspoken..

Empty walls.

She sat in her new room, her mind blank as she stared at empty walls she was planning on filling with cool poster she was never going to buy, and drawings she was going to be too lazy to draw.

This could work! she thought. she would have a lot of fun here. going out to cafes and shopping with her friends.

sadly, her closest friends weren’t that type.

If only she had her sister with her. they would have so much fun. but that will have to wait another year, if not two.

Surly there was someone out there she could get along with.

maybe they were wondering about her too, at that moment.

but, that would never happen if she didn’t widen her circle, and get to know new people.

That’s the only way she was going to find out if she were meant to walk this earth alone. okay that was really dramatic, even for her.

It didn’t bother her much that she didn’t have a best friend, most of the time.

what bothered her was that she was not a genius or an artist or a writer. she had no excuse to be this way.

If she had some special talent it would be understandable that she didn’t socialise much and have many friends. you know, play the tortured soul card. but she wasn’t a tortured soul. she was a stupid, time wasting, bad-book-reading, good-music-listening (My  taste in music rocks, ehem), idiot.

Things had to change.

[Terry: I was considering putting up some pictures but, then I read all about the “empty walls” and “empty parks” and got too depressed.]

Welcome to a new friend| Cole Ryan

Cole Ryan

Cole Ryan


Hm.. I never know what to write here.

I’m Cole. Nope, I’m not famous enough for this to be written in third-person. I just thought I could use a blog as an outlet for some of my thoughts. I’m not a pastor or theologian or anything, I’m just a writer. I didn’t really think I’d get as much traffic as I have.. so I’m doing my best to make any improvements I can!

There isn’t very much to say about me, but there is plenty to say about my goal. To simplify it, though, I like to borrow Desiring God‘s mission statement: “Everything we do aims to spread a passion for the supremacy of God in all things for the joy of all peoples through Jesus Christ. God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him.”

I wrote an eBook.. Dear Guys: A New Way To Date

Follow me on Twittah: @KingCohl

Subscribe to mah newsletter/email list for short, monthly updates! was formally known as

via About Me | Cole Ryan.

Christians & Dating

June 27, 2013 by Cole Ryan

Christians aren’t very good at dating. There have been plenty of Christian dating books and articles, and all of them have addressed the fact that there is a problem with the way we view dating, but none of them have really gotten to the root of the problem.

Ultimately, I think there are two reasons why the way we date doesn’t really work too well.

1. We either take dating too lightly, by simply dating someone to have fun or to fit in: in doing this we don’t even treat dating as a gateway to marriage – we hardly ever even consider marriage as an option.

2. Or we over-spiritualize and/or over-romanticize dating: in doing this we think that somehow “the one” is out there waiting for us – as if God designed a soul mate specifically for us.

Both of which are destructive.

I don’t think that the answer to either of these problems are as black and white as we like to think they are, or that they can be fixed as easily as we think they can be. These problems can’t be fixed with strategies and

formulas, that is what makes them tough.

I do think that if we get to the root of these problems that they will be much easier to fix. Most dating books and articles talk about the actions that take place within dating, they talk about how to date. I don’t think the answers we’re looking for will be found in behavior modification – we have to dig deeper than that. We have to find our motive and intention behind wanting to date someone, we have to find the reason for which we date someone.

I think focusing on the root of the problem rather than the surface of the problem is universally effective, yet we don’t apply this logic to dating.

This is why I wrote Dear Guys: A New Way To Date. It’s not your typical Christian dating book. It’s not a book telling you when to date, or how to date, it’s all about why we date – because when we figure out the why, it will change the when and the how.

I Recommend



Love Does by Bob Goff




Asaph’s Arrows by Kings Kaleidoscope



The Village Church – Sermon Audio

iPhone App:


Ask Pastor John



The Resurgence



Welcome to a new friend: Rajat Chauhan | PICZLoad

PICZLoadWatchout Incredible Pictures & Download for free!




I write what I love. Sheer observer of old-new things happening around, so I can make them happen too. Love technology though I use old gadgets. Love paintings, specially modern art.  Sometime I play with wet brush and stroke it on the empty canvas so that some imagination can evolve through. 

I believe in the simplicity of ideas……………….

An enthusiastic writer, photography learner, sheer painter, passionate traveller and  storyteller………………..

Love music  actually I enjoy all kind of music  sometime even don’t get a single word of the lyrics…………eheheheh

Travel to different places and explore with people,  things, cultures , languages, tastes is all about good times and experience……………………want to travel more, learn more…….

 I’m just about starting out.

Interests vary. I chill excessively with friends and follow obscene amounts of weblogs. On a lighter
note, I’m here to learn, try to stay in peace and overcome technology,
while falling in love with the tiny nonsense of daily life if you know what I mean to say!

Between finding excuses to brew more filter coffee, scribble on, smoke & fire it’s just the beginning. 



                                                                                 Thank YOU folks!

Rangbhoomi – My Art



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2013-04-20 11.39.08

Listen up, ladies, here’s what it takes to get a man! | Hollis Plample

Hey Sweetheart We Get Rewrites

Listen up, ladies, here’s what it takes to get a man!

Listen up, ladies, here's what it takes to get a man!

via Listen up, ladies, here’s what it takes to get a man! | Hollis Plample.

Mortal | Nolan O’Malley


My bags are packed for the trip of a lifetime. I am simply going to find a way out of the smoothed groove of my typical lifestyle. I, as motionless as ever, wander into vacationed spots captured in my neurons. I’m sure if they measure my brainwaves -whomever they are- I would be considered brain dead. I’m not a journeyman; I am not a foolish traveler. I simply need to exist outside of this place long enough to make it home. Living in cycles is as dangerous as playing with sickles, you make one wrong move and your soul needs reaping!

I occasionally need to exhale my mental stress. Yes, that’s the best way of stating it. I try to find joy in love and love in hobby. I am the living tree debarked. I am pulled away from normality, but I still exist healthily. I take my transformation seriously- as serious as I take my own work. I love like my roots and absorb the reciprocation; I write with fervor just to express my leaves.

Enough with these metaphors and similes, imagery and masked talk. All I need is an image in my head of what love and passion culminates. What will I become in the long run? Will I have wasted time in contemplated growth, or am I finding a path to a treasured place? My skills are not sharp enough and my love is not concentrated enough. I can not see into that future until those truths are carved deep. I need a pen. I need a kiss. I need a vacation…

via Mortal | Nolan O’Malley.

Welcome to a new friend: Wyndy Dee

Wyndy Dee

This WordPress site is where creative minds come together! Writers, Editors, Bloggers and Readers Welcome!

About ME

Happily Married to my husband for 24 years (25 years July 30), 3 kids and a grandson whom I totally adore. I was injured in an accident April 2011 and had back surgery including placing a new disk and screws in my lower back. I have not been able to work since as a Paramedic in the ER nor will I most likely ever be able to work in that field again. I was able to turn a hobby and love into an Awsum Career as an Editor with The Writer’s Coffee Shop and Leader of Team Awsum. I recently started this blog to just promote my authors every now and then and it just took on a life of its own. I absolutely love my RCC peeps and the WordPress Family. Thanks for being a part of this wonderful and exciting journey!

Go Team Awsum!!

I have met some of the most wonderful people who have shared their heart, their dreams, and their words with me. I feel honored to have known them and call them friends.

I love helping promote authors, blog tours and Facebook Release Day Parties! Love what I am doing! Helping make authors dreams come true!

via About ME | Wyndy Dee.


*places hand over heart*
I VOW to post something new and good that is personal at least weekly!


A good friend gave another good friend some advice that struck a chord in me that I really knew already but seemed to not really take notice until it was said the way it was presented yesterday…and it really got me to thinking.

When I put myself down, I am basically telling my husband he was a fool to marry me. I am insulting the love of his life, I wouldn’t do that to anyone else,

why do I do it to my loving husband? 

I know right, such a simple statement, but it really hit a nerve.  My wonderful husband loves me…all my faults and all the goodness and all the PAST stuff that I let hold me back.  He has been there since I was 17 years old, well really 18, because we started “officially” dating 15 days after my 18th birthday, but still, a LOOOOOONG time, and he is still here, he loves me so very much and treats me so good, so he deserves better!

Then it got me to thinking about RCC and why it means so much to me, and the wonderful people I have already met through this site.  Thanks Green Embers!  I am gonna make it through this whole “life changing accident” and come out even better, tried by fire, polished and ready to take on whatever God has put me here on this Earth to accomplish.  I have such wonderful support here, my family, my church and my bestie of course, Lorenz, who kicks my butt and loves me in spite of myself and my authors and bloggers but especially Trenda, my newest gift.  She makes me want to do better as I help her see herself as she should and as everybody else does as well.  She is amazing. She has been through a lot and I am so excited to be helping her fulfill a dream….be watching for it….very soon!  I know I am here to encourage others and be supportive and promote EVERYONE I can!  It amazes me how easy it is to support, encourage, tell people how much God loves them and that they have a purpose, yet I can use that same mouth and eyes to never say or see that for myself.  What is up with that?!

That would be the root of condemnation, of seeds sown when I was young by people who were supposed to love me, take care of me and keep me safe but failed miserably. Now, that being said, I don’t blame them anymore because I am a big girl and I also made many, many wrong choices that caused me to end up where I am today, but also many, many good choices that have got me HERE, blogging, today.  I forgave them a long time ago and love them very much, even if they aren’t in my life by their choice or mine.  It is a process…

Condemnation is the root that is buried deep, deep down in your heart that were seeds sown into our life through words and actions that produce fear, low self-esteem, low self-confidence and general self dislike.  I am here to tell you that I am getting some weed killer that has that “no re-emergent” stuff in it and slowly getting rid of all those weeds and replace with beautiful flowers, trees and people that make me better rather than tear me down.

I am a work-in-progress, created for a purpose and I plan to dig until I know without a doubt what that is and be sure to make a difference in this life I was given.

I did not die on April 5, 2011, and I will no longer take that gift for granted!

Will I have some bad days, yeah….the pain and the weight are a constant reminder of that life-changing event…but I promise to take it day by day and push myself to do better every day and say at least one good thing about me to my husband and my kids and myself to reinforce this commitment.  Who is with me?!

Oh, and why “No More Blueberries”…well, when I am being down in the mouth, or about to cross the line into negative territory and put myself down or someone else….I need a LOUD “Blueberries” to remind me that I am crossing the line.  IF I do cross the line, yuck…I have to eat the thing I really, really think is disgusting and that is blueberries.  Can’t stand the taste, texture or smell!  So that is a punishment reinforcement that I have put into place for myself and others to remind me, and I will work hard not to have to eat blueberries and since I have none in my house, I will be buying them today, because if there are none around, I won’t truly be accountable!

Thanks everybody for your love, support and blueberries!  Gosh, I hope I can transition fast or I will be hearing people yelling blueberries in my sleep.  Yes…I realize it isn’t gonna happen overnight…Oh Lord, help me!

*shudders at the thought of eating those gross things*

For Rome Construction Crew (RCC):



Stepparent: Is this the worst job in the world or what? | BLACK, WHITE & READ ALL OVER

Stepparent: Is this the worst job in the world or what?


I have been with my girlfriend for three years, living with her for the past two. She has two daughters from her first marriage, ages 14 (almost 15) and 10. I am convinced being “the man who loves their mommy” is some kind of codeword for them which means “Let’s try and sabotage their relationship and do whatever we can to make HIS life miserable”….I need a place to vent, and where better than here? Like I said, I live with my girlfriend who I love every much, and her two daughters ages 14 and 10. I am not a mean person by any stretch of the imagination. I pretty much live by the motto “Live and let live”…or “You don’t bother me, and I won’t bother you”…lately this has been tested WAAY too often, and I am about to burst!

More at  Stepparent: Is this the worst job in the world or what? | BLACK, WHITE & READ ALL OVER.

Faithfully Yours | You By My Side

Faithfully Yours

14 Tuesday May 2013

Posted by aimi in LOVE



M and I know that we both feel the same way but sometimes we just forget out of nowhere… maybe because of stress from work or because we really had a bad day or we were both cranky the day before. As I had listed in 10 ways to show you care, M and I often try our best to show that we care especially when we are feeling really… terrible in other aspect of our lives.

It is interesting how we start to feel worry when we both know that our feeling haven’t changed. Work stress, bad weather, bad day, or just sick… they all affect our stability it seems. Recently, M and I can tell if one had a bad day or are not feeling so well from the number of “i love you” messages sent in the day time when we are both supposed to be working.

We both know that we are faithful to each other and we love each other same amount but… one little drip of poison just make us feel more security. Thankfully, we both know that and we can cope with it in our own term and express why and what is making us feel like extra care at the time.

But despite of the fact that I still feel insecure, it is not that I don’t trust his words … so it is a big difference from past relationship when I could not trust completely.

via Faithfully Yours | You By My Side.

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