Tag Archives: Family

Feel Free to NOT FOLLOW ME | Kudos to HarsH ReaLiTy

HarsH ReaLiTy

My goal with this blog is to offend everyone in the world at least once with my words… so no one has a reason to have a heightened sense of themselves. We are all ignorant, we are all found wanting, we are all bad people sometimes.

Feel Free to NOT FOLLOW ME

I rarely use foul or vulgar language without reason. That being said, don’t come here and tell me to change my words. Read something else or stop following me. I could care less, especially if your intent is to “mom” someone on THEIR BLOG! I won’t censor myself for any of you. Just don’t come back.


via Feel Free to NOT FOLLOW ME | HarsH ReaLiTy.


The average house wife | Welcome to a new friend: JDSelmser

In love with the idea of being in love

JD Selmser is the dreamer who traveled 8000 miles by plane then 500 miles by train just for a kiss and the possibility of love only for it to not be the one. (Hard to believe when I finally found her she was only 300 miles away). He is the guy who searches for magical sunsets, waterfalls and believes in true love, soul mates and kisses that take your breath away, with the support of his true soul mate. Eventually, inevitably, he ended up writing about romance and those things that go bump in the night. JD also loves animals and can be seen walking with his little dog Spazz, building model ships and searching for a new place in the world to discover.



Sarah decided that she did not want to work outside the house, but wanted to do freelance writing from home so that she could spent more time at home with the mini me. Now I am pretty open and supportive to this idea. I have always thought that a woman’s place in the home and relationship is exactly where she feels the most fulfilled no matter where it is. Sarah truly had the choice to just stay home or work full or part time. When I see how happy she is and how happy Wyatt is I know that she made the right choice.

Sarah has this idea that I am supporting her, but this is one of the few points that we do not see eye to eye. For me I see it as she is doing what’s best for our lives and our family. Who makes the money or how much less we make a month is not nearly as important as the fact that we have a happy family. Our kids do not see arguing or fighting, but they see two happy parents in love. Wyatt is an extremely bright and happy baby. Even though we had an absolutely amazing baby sitter, but she was not mom to our little bundle of joy. I can go to work and not worry about the little one. He is chatting as most babies are and I know that Sarah talks to him, she encourages him and as a mother is supposed to she adores him.  That is absolutely priceless.

The other day I was watching Dr Phil and there was a couple who made a similar choice. Honestly I was ashamed to be the gender as the guy. He seemed to look at the most important job a parent can do as more of sacrifice then an honor. When a man looks at the loss of income as a sacrifice rather than well-being of his family he has to re-evaluate his priorities. Sacrifice to me means sacrifice which is a cost that comes with regret. The well-being of my wife is family no matter what the requirement is not sacrifice that comes with regrets, but an honor.

My parent’s life was a lot simpler in a way because they knew that the needs of the family are more important than the extras. I cannot speak for the rest of you, but for too long I bought way too many extras. Not at the expense of the family’s needs, but definitely not things that I needed. I think as a culture we need to always remember that needs and wants are not the same. We need food, shelter and love, but a new cell phone, a faster laptop or 500 cable channels are wants not needs.

I want to end this with one final thought. The common house wife is the one that makes care of the house, guides their children and deserves all the acknowledgement and praise for the outstanding work they do. You can never judge accomplishments, importance or pride based on dollar and cents because money does not last forever ,but family will because your actions today will help guide who the generations after are and can be.

Also we have four kids so if I was at home I think some days there would be at least three kids duct taped to a wall.



Follow JD on Twitter @JDSelmser and sign up for his e-newsletter at

via The average house wife | JDSelmser.

My NaNoWriMo Entry part 2


After a few requests to post more I decided to post a few more chapters of my book “Little White Lies”

Chapter Two – A mystery of sorts

            I waited around and once visiting hours were over, I left. There were a lot more questions in my mind now, than when I arrived. First question I had amongst the long list was, who Stacey was and did I give her this book? Why had I written that letter? More secrets from the past, that’s all my life really was. I followed the motions pretending to be the man I used to be, but there were always more and more little secrets. As I left the building I must have been deep in thought as I never heard the clapping of high heels on the pavement behind me until she was just a few steps away. As I turned and looked there was Maria standing there mouth half open like she had something to say, but couldn’t put the words together.

From my jacket pocket I grabbed a cigarette and fought the wind to light it. As soon as the smoke hit the air, she curled her nose and just stared at me. I took the hint and tossed it aside. I know it’s a filthy habit and I have been trying to quit for years, but it’s one of my many weaknesses. She had this apologetic look in her eyes and muttered, “Mr. Skuce you did not have to stop smoking on my account.”


Nervous Breakdown before Dinner | Welcome to new friends: Amy and Sara


We can’t do it all, but we do a lot…here’s just a slice

The Sisters


Sara and I are about as opposite as two people can get. We came from the same batter but the cakes turned out to be different flavors. She was my first friend and all of my childhood memories include her.  Perhaps molded from her birth placement as the oldest of three daughters, she was born to be a nurturer and caretaker .  Her one and only dream growing up was to be a wife and mother.

Like George Bailey (this makes me Harry) she was born an old soul and spent most of her adolescence caring and worrying about her friends and classmates. Spending many an hour reading young adult Christian romance novels and filling her hope chest (while her friends were out partying)  embedded a passion for a home to keep one day.

Always a late bloomer, Sara finds herself just over 40 and a mother to three boys ages 0-6.  She is a self-taught cook that turns out gourmet tasting meals from ingredients that are on hand. Cooking is her happy place and only hobby.  As a mom on a budget the only shopping she really does is for groceries but she enjoys it (as long as it’s with out the kids). She’s always been a thoughtful crafter and creative soul. I call her often to hear about her meal plans, or text her a photo of something I’m working on to get her input or advice. You’ll be inspired by her contribution to this blog and you’ll laugh at the delivery. Enjoy a “slice” of her life…

Honestly, Amy


37361_407825580761_4138254_n   My earliest memory was this little thing called, “Amy Grace” coming home from the hospital. She was a shy and quiet little gal for the first year and then…..the sparkle happened. My middle sister is a textbook middle child with a twinkle in her eye and a gift. In our teens when most people were perturbed to have their kid sister tag along-I was grateful ’cause anywhere Amy is -is where you want to be. She is an adventurous soul, she loves to entertain and adds brightness to any room she enters.

Although we started out wearing mostly “sister” dresses as children-our taste and style could not be more different. Amy has always had a great eye and been able to choose “the” piece – whether it be the addition of a scarf, vest or ring-or selecting that timeless item to build a room around. I must admit some of my best pieces are ones I’ve shopped from her home or closet!

A.G. is a busy mother of three girls. She does the real mom stuff I never do -like playing games, sledding and eating lunch with them at school.  She has been a” working outside the home Momma” as well as the stay at home kind and does them both so well. She is a natural organizer-and her closet looks like mine is always supposed to.

Amy’s cookin is spicy and full of flavor!  I love the way she cooks a few meals on Saturday to use thru the week! She is a relaxed hostess with the mostess and you always feel welcome at her home.  There is never a dull moment in her life and I know you will enjoy whatever slice she serves you.

Sincerely, Sara

The Sisters were born in Kankakee, Illinois and spent much of their lives in the Quad Cities. Amy now lives in Northwestern Iowa with her husband and 3 daughters. Sara lives in Southwestern Wisconsin with her husband and 3 sons (If only they had a housekeeper named “Alice”).

via Nervous Breakdown before Dinner | thesisterslice.

Late summer supper and one of my best childhood memories


When I was growing up we had enough. Not everything I wanted and sometimes I had to wait for what I needed. There were times we had plenty and times we had enough.

One dinner late summer when I was 10 or 11, Mom called us for dinner. We have corn on the cob, sliced tomatoes and…fried zucchini.  I thought it was great! Like an appetizer we never ordered on the rare occasion we went out to dinner. I loved it. Mom dipped the slices in egg, dusted with flour and fried in a little veg oil on the stove. I loved them. I remember that dinner–it was before school started, we were all together in a little duplex in Bradley and I was happy. What I didn’t know then is that was all we had…..ALL we had to eat!

Today is a good day! It is a week before school starts–We have grabbed summer by the horns and lived to tell a tale! At church this week there was a table where folks brought their garden abundance to share. I saw boxes of zucchini and took a couple. I can never cook zucchini without thinking of that day. I usually grill them but today we are going to have them the ‘ole fashion way–fried.

From Mama to Dawta and Back Around Again |Catching up with BLACK, WHITE & READ ALL OVER

Girl getting hair braided

From Mama to Dawta and Back Around Again

She sat on the floor, in between her Mama’s knees and got her hair braided.  (Such a sweet little girl.) Her Mama kept telling her “Your Daddy ain’t shyt.  He’s low down and no good.  Men in general ain’t shyt.  Don’t trust ‘em!”  She believed her.

20 years later, she sat in her girlfriend’s kitchen, getting her hair braided.  (Such a sweet young woman.)  She heard her stick girl saying “I’m done with him.  He ain’t shyt.  Men in general ain’t shyt.  Don’t trust ‘em!”  She believed her.

And now she’s a single Mom with her own daughter.

How do you think their conversation about men will go?

It is the responsibility of the men to live up to their titles of Father, Husband, Man…

It is the responsibility of the women to live up to their titles of Mother, Wife, Woman…

We live up and lead by a GOOD example for the sake of our children.

Legacy is involved here.

via From Mama to Dawta and Back Around Again | BLACK, WHITE & READ ALL OVER.

Terry Irving’s Autobiography (Parts 1 & 2)

Check it out – Support Hey Sweetheart, Get Me Rewrite

On the Road (Time Cut: 1969 to 2013)

Please Buy My Books and Support This Blog.

Feelings on Trayvon Martin (Guest Blog by Wendell Wylie)

Wendel WylieI have thought long and hard trying to decide whether my friends and family needed to know my feelings about Trayvon.

Finally, I decided yes.

Not because I feel he was profiled which led to his death, but because of the way in which Black men are viewed every day. My friends know me and know I have never been one to respond to these incidents as anything other than small minded people doing stupid things. My friends and family here know that I spent 35+ years in a loving relationship with Diana. And most of them have heard the stories here told and retold and have heard me describe how I reacted with humor to each situation.

Think, for example, about Diana and I at dinner at an upscale restaurant and, while waiting at the door, a woman coming up to me and demanding that I get her fur from the coat room for her. I got it without saying a word and then embarrassed her husband in a crowded restaurant by demanding a tip. And after he gave me my tip, I went out with my wife and our friends and got into my Jaguar parked in the owner’s spot and drove away.

Or they have heard the story of my waiting outside of a supermarket for Diana to come out on a Saturday afternoon and a woman not of my race demanding that I put her groceries in her car for her, not knowing that I would have done it anyway. When Diana came out and saw me loading her car, she knew what had happened and I had to pull her away before she and the lady had a sociological discussion. And we laughed all the way home.

They have heard the story of our arriving late to a Main Line Christmas party and my dropping her off. And when I came in, the man in charge of the servers came to me and yelled I was late, gave me my golden jacket and told me to get to work. When the hostess saw me serving drinks with a smile…well, you can imagine.

They have heard the story of our Granddaughter, when it was discovered that I needed a kidney, unhesitatingly offering hers. The doctors and nurses, not seeing us together, thought it was wonderful of her to make such an offer until they put it together that I was her grandfather. Then they demanded that she tell them whether she was being forced to donate the kidney and, as we laughed, she explained that she had known me as her grandfather all her life and that I would not have to force her to do such a thing….she was doing it out of the love that our family shared.

One last story …as I walked through Arlington Virginia at 3:00 in the morning, looking for someplace to eat at a Bridge tournament, accompanied by a friend who was a lawyer (I was an assistant DA at the time). He was 6’4 and 180 pounds with a long scraggly beard and, yes, he was white.

A policeman stopped us, telling us that two men fitting our description…well you know the rest. A sergeant came, we laughed and explained that we all knew that there were not two men fitting our description at 3:00 in the morning in Arlington and returned to our hotel.

I chose to deal with all of these situations with laughter because that was the best way to deal with the people with the small minds who could only see one thing…the color of my skin. We had hundreds of these instances in our 35 years together and my 60 years on earth. I can understand Trayvon’s anger and can understand why he could not laugh. My friends all understood that my laughing was the way I disarmed those that approached me in that fashion.

And Diana knew that when we got home away from those idiots, because I was able, unlike Trayvon, to go home,…she held me while I cried.

[Terry: Wendell Wylie and I both went to Haverford College, graduating in 1973. He went on to get his law degree from Boston College Law School after which he moved to Miami where he met and married Diana Wylie in 1979. They moved to Philadelphia in 1980, where Wendell first worked as an Assistant District Attorney, then in a private law practice, and finally moved into the mortgage business where he still works today.

Wendell and Diana raised three children and were gifted with nine grandchildren (including a set of triplets) and one great grandchild. Diana fought colon cancer for four years before finally passing away in June of 2012.  Wendell still lives in their family home in the Philadelphia area.]

I would appreciate it if any of the great people who follow this blog would repost or simply reprint this post.  Thanks.

How to Survive When You’ve Been Fired and Your World is Blown Apart




  The middle class is disappearing at an increasing rate as excellent workers who thought of themselves as essential members of a corporate team are fired. At first, you have to deal with the shame and social stigma–you’ve failed your family and your own self-image. Then comes the hard realities of looking for work–dealing with job advertisements and Human Resources and endless interviews. Finally, if you don’t find a new position, how will you survive?  How will you feed and house your family? Are you destined to lose all that you’ve fought for?


One out of four Americans has lost their job during this endless recession and even more have had a friend or family member out of work. A new book, written by veteran TV Journalist Terry Irving has the answers you really need to deal with the emotional, financial, and practical aspects of this sadly far too common situation.

How does he know? He knows because, even though he has won multiple Emmys, DuPonts, and Peabody Awards for his reporting, Irving has been fired several times and spent 9 out of the past 20 years without a steady job.

He hasn’t just studied the problem.  He’s lived it and he’s done better than survive. He owns his home, has a top credit rating, has put two children through private schools and good colleges and, most importantly, has had fun along the way.

Check out this book on Amazon Kindle today and get the tips and tricks you’ll need to survive from someone who knows exactly what works and what doesn’t.

  How to Keep Your Lifestyle After You’ve Been Fired

Welcome to a new friend: Mary Wheeler | The Search for Clarity

The Search for Clarity

Transformations, Successes, Hopes, Dreams


“What Doesn’t Kill Me Makes Me Stronger”

I’m Mary Wheeler. I’m 19 years young and a junior at the University of Minnesota studying Family Social Science and Psychology. I am an aspiring writer and couple and family therapist. I am striving for happiness and a sense of control over my life. I’ve come very far from where I have been and what I have been through. I work hard to get where I want and to achieve my goals.

via About | The Search for Clarity.

If you’re new to my blog, here are some topics you can expect to see:

Writing, Short stories, Poetry, Honesty, Feelings, Occasional Rants, Flash Fiction, Relationship (sustaining, helping, rebuilding, nurturing) Related Posts, Family, School, Minnesota, Helping, Health, Workouts, Exercise, Food, Love, Quotes, Tattoos, Piercings, Advice, Helper Resources/Articles, Vignettes, Memories, Photography, and much more. 



A Reflection About Family


Family is a complicated concept. It didn’t used to be, but with all the disowning, disapproval, judgement, and issues with religion, sexuality, identity, etc. the notion of family has become somewhat distorted.

The traditional definition of family is biological ties and a shared living space. It also includes two parents of opposite genders and children. Divorced parents, homosexual and cohabiting couples, and single parents are not included in this definition. Best friends, close colleagues, and anyone who is supportive aren’t included either.

The definition of family has changed dramatically as people go through difficult times within the family and without. Many people have to go outside those biologically related to them to find what they need in relationships. Family has turned into anyone who is unconditionally supportive and loving.

While I fully support seeking support, love, and care anywhere you can find it, I think it’s sad that we even have to go outside our blood relatives to do so. Our biological families should be there for us – no matter what. They should care about our well-being in an appropriate way. They should want us to be with someone we love and who loves us back. They should want us to be open with them. They should want us to come to them when we need help. Family shouldn’t judge or destroy us. I will never understand why some family dynamics are the way they are, nobody can understand it all, but it deeply saddens me that there are people who cannot turn to their family with everything and be welcomed with unconditional love.

All the shit that life throws at us is terrible and not having a family, or even a single member, to turn to makes it harder to handle. We cannot handle everything on our own. We need the love and support of others to make it through difficult times. And if we have to turn to our best friends, colleagues, teammates, and others over those who are our blood to help us, then so be it. All I know is I think it’s a tragedy. Not having your biological family step up and set their values, beliefs, and pride aside to be there for you and provide a safe place for you is a tragedy.

If you fit into this category… I apologize on behalf of your family. You are a beautiful person regardless of your struggles and imperfections. They have no right to desert you. Find others. You deserve better. You’re worthy. Carry on.


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Welcome to a new friend: | yiyime — vienaqui


Life-Nutrition-Health-Poetry-Travel- Art-Photography…More


It has been some time now since I first wrote this about me page and I just wanted to make some changes and updates. Since I last wrote I am no longer struggling with my weight issues and I have been trying very hard to maintain my now healthy weight.Needless to say I feel healthy , I feel good and I feel simply fantastic.

As far as my personal life if you have had the opportunity to read some of my posts , I had a very tough life , but I know many of us have similar experiences. I , still struggle at times in understanding my life in general but I know that I do have the courage and determination that takes to live a semi normal and happy life , and I have also come to terms with the fact that not only I was robbed of my childhood but also robbed of my mostly all of my family. To date I have tried unsuccessfully to get connected with both sides of my family , the ones from my mother side of the family as well as my father’s family. Although , it is true that perhaps no sibling’s bond was formed nor well established especially with my half siblings from my father side of the family , I had been hoping that now that we have grown into mature adults that it would have been possible for us to have at least an amicable relationship but that has not been the case.

I must say that I find it so ironic that it was I who had to endured many years locked away in an orphanage , all the while both of my biological parents were still alive and well I might add , I was the one that after not been able to remain in these orphanages had to ended up homeless , on the streets trying to find a helping , generous hands or a quiet dark place , including public bathrooms to sleep at night. I was the one that many times cried myself to sleep hungry , un-showered and feel empty and totally lonely inside , with nowhere to go , without nothing except a little light of hope deep within my heart; that was the only thing that I had going for me , my faith, nothing more.
There are times looking back that I feel as I am indeed one of God’s favorite’s daughters since I went through so much but I feel God always was by my side protecting me from all would have, could have happened to me that never did, especially being naive and attractive young female alone in the streets.

The thing that I find so ironic is that despite everything that I went trough especially in my most vulnerable years , I managed to survive and although it took me awhile , given that I, also managed to come to a different country and encountered a new language and a brand new culture , I worked hard , very hard and got myself an education , and finally got to graduate with a professional degree , something I am deeply proud of . I could have easily gave up and stay unmotivated encountering all of what I could have interpreted as a big huge barriers and obstacles but my eagerness and my great fear of being homeless again held me back and I grabbed each and every moment as an opportunity even if it meant washing dishes , mopping floors etc. You would think that my family would be happy for me , knowing all of my earlier struggles and surviving skills , my guts and determination to succeed, but no , instead of that , all I found was jealousy , envy and words such as “God just compensated you “. Surely God has always been by my side and no one knows that better than I , but lets face it , I just didn’t just lay in bed or in the couch waiting for God to have pity on me, if that was the case , I am more than certain would be dead by now.

I am not going to lie by saying that I am not disappointed by all of my family rejection of me , after all it is personal and it is hurtful , but at the same time , even thought there are my family , I need to consider the source and the fact that perhaps all that I went through , was indeed for a reason. Who is to say that somewhere deep within my subconscious ,God did not give me an insight and a test or preparation for a tougher future , the one I was going to go through, and that in order to survive it I needed to have the knowledge and skills of self-preservation , I like to see it that way , because I too spent many times during my life feeling sorry for myself because of feeling alone and unwanted. I now have a nice home , a nice limited family but one that appreciates me and knows that I am strong and most importantly they love me and know the real me , the God within me and all the good that God himself has given and installed within me.

I wrote this page for all of you up-there who might be going through though times , for all of you who are or have felt lonely , sad and alone. You are never alone , not matter what your Religion is or is not , not matter what you happened to believe in , as for me God is indeed within each and every one of us all we need to do is have faith , remain strong and know that all you need to do to find God is to look within yourself , find the genuine good within and there you will feel God’s love in your heart and in your soul. No one should ever contemplate taking their own lives because of despair , loneliness , sadness and sorrow , let alone an eight year old , who finds herself locked up in an orphanage , just like I did . Just because you might feel that your life is seemingly hopeless , trust me it is not . Life is worth living, I , hope I don’t come across as preaching , because I must tell you I am not ashamed to say that I am not a Christian but I do have faith as big and as strong as Hercules. I do however , believe in humanity and the fact that I feel that as imperfect as we might be we need to have a personal relationship with God in whichever way you prefer to , since you don’t even need to know how to pray or go to church to show that you believe. The only tool you need to have to communicate with God is yourself . Just talk to God as if you were talking to anyone else but just make sure your cries and your conversation with him and everything you are questioning him about or asking of him , comes from your genuine heart and goodwill.

La Chic

La Chic

Planting And Growing


earth 2

Spread Love

flor bella
Spread Love…like the flowers spread its petals
spread love like the wind spreads fresh air
spread the love like the birds spread its feathers
spread the love like the ocean spreads its gentle waves
spread love until there is no more suffering and pain

spread love and you will spread kindness
spread love and you will inhale joy…
spread love and you will share the goodwill of happiness
spread love and you will see rewards

spread love like God spread its blessings
spread love like rainfall spreads abundance
and the sun spreads sunshine
spread hatred…and dark shadows will follow
the rain becomes thunder …the wind becomes tornadoes
within yourself…..
spread hatred and the waves of the ocean will swallow you
and wash you away to shore …with hardly nothing more
than your own pool of loneliness and bitter suffocating
misery !

JIMROMENESKO.COM – No Dogs or Old People

The reader who forwarded this Craigslist ad writes: “I guess the days of ‘will offer employment for food and board’ are now upon us. And notice that they require applicants be between 20-35 in age. Isn’t that illegal?” ( | Read the reactions from my Facebook friends and subscribers. | UPDATE: The ad has been deleted, but I’ve posted the text.

via » Morning report for May 31, 2013 JIMROMENESKO.COM.

Deleted “Unique Startup Opportunity” Craigslist ad

This Craigslist was deleted by its author, but the text was saved by Romenesko.CL new york brooklyn all jobs writing/editing jobsUnique Startup Opportunity

You and four other applicants will be invited to LIVE, WORK, and PLAY with an exciting new tech startup based out of a beautiful property on one of the nicest blocks in the Hamptons.

Our team is in the process of building a transparent e-commerce platform that’s going to change the world. To do that we need designers, programmers, content creators and just about every other talent you can think of. . .

Chosen applicants will be given a large bedroom, three delicious meals a day and the possibility long-term employment with potential equity option ownership – in exchange for 50 hours a week of hard work.

You will be working side-by-side and living with a team of young executives who share a combined 30 years of industry experience.

Your free time is yours to do with what you please, whether that be taking a night job, traveling away for the weekend or enjoying what could quite possibly be the best place on the planet to spend one’s summer.

High School Degree

Must be between the ages of 20 and 35

2012-04-13 17.38.41

But Dude, Like I’m only 23. Seriously, I have this rare medical condition where my hair went gray when I was, like, five. And I can so definitely do the work, man.  And being in the Hamptons would just be radical. Work all morning and surf all afternoon, right? I’m telling you, I’m 23..ok 24 in a bad light. I’ve still got a motorcycle and all the latest Pearl Jam recordings.  Oh? They’re too old to work here? Really? I went to see the Rolling Stones last week…OK, they’re all grandfathers but they’re still cool, right? Oh, the word ‘cool’ isn’t cool any more? How about ‘Shiny’? Well, yeah, that ‘s from Firefly but that’s like in the future and all.  Look, I can do push ups and … OK, I can do A pushup. Whew, it’s hot out here. Really, dude, I’m a young dude, dude. Oh, you don’t want to be called dude? Why not? Yeah, but there are like Woman Dudes, right?  Not since the 80’s, huh?  Well, OK, if you don’t want me, I’ll take off. Hey, I hate to ask but you don’t have money for the bus, do you? A bus? Well, it’s like a big car except lots of people can ride in it. No, it’s not a limousine.

Ah, never mind.

Welcome to a new friend: Kedadelaide: Free Little Words

Free Little Words

via About | Free Little Words.


Mum to two, wife, teacher, sister, daughter, aunty and a few others in between. Intending to blog every day for a year.

So I have this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to tell you about this blog (and the person behind the keyboard) in as few words as possible so you actually get to the good stuff after this little intro without tuning out. Well here goes and I’ll try and keep it as succinct as possible.

An example from 1949.

Friends, family and a few foes call me Kel (Mum, Mrs H and darl also rate high up there).

Humour will feature on a regular basis as I try to look on the lighter side of love and occasionally I post something worthy of discussion or debate. I am a writer-in-the-making who is, more than likely, not going to hear back from the publisher once I’ve actually sent the manuscript (they don’t even send rejection letters anymore)! When I am forced into a 18×18 foot room filled with 30 bodies I am a teacher but please don’t ask me to answer any Science questions!  My love for my two boys (currently aged 5 and 3) will feature regularly but you’ll also find a smattering of poorly written poetry.

Greeting card with horses on

Free Little Words is about love in all its different forms. I don’t dwell or rant. Maudlin and I do not see eye to eye. I prefer positive and to find the silver lining in any given circumstance.

The name of my blog came to be from those three little words we all wish to hear whether it be from a parent, child, lover or partner. ’Free’ was substituted for ‘three’ because they don’t cost anything to say and my little guy, then 2, could not say three properly-it came out as free.

I hope that you gain something from reading a post or two. Maybe you’ll have smiled, laughed or even shared your thoughts. Whatever brings you here, please take an ‘I Love You’ with you and give it to your child/ren.

Until tomorrow,

A Certain Type of Love

Love of different types.

What is it about some kids that makes them more able to outwardly express their love while others are just not the cuddly type? Is there any genetic factors at play? When the environment is the same for both how can it play out so differently for each?


If they were referred to as type A and type B; I have one of each.

Type A: fiercely independent yet anxious when facing new situations, high-strung, intelligent, realistic and happy just to ‘be’ with the ones he loves.

Type B: caring, kind and generous soul, ‘shadows’ trusted adults, smart, physically displays affection often and easy going.

While the youngest has grown up in a love-rich environment, the same as which his older brother was brought home to, Just 3 has taught his older brother a thing or two. Being a naturally loving soul has increased that loving feeling exponentially in our home.

English: me and my friend

I know my child feels love. Is it possible to teach someone how to express love?

I believe that my youngest has done just that.

A desire to be equal may be the motivation for Now 6′s acts of affection. He has learned to show the closeness of the bond of love.

When I speak of love and affection with others it leaves me pondering.

For some families, love is expressed daily. On the phone, ‘love you’ ends every call. Text messages contain love or, at the very least, a heart. Love is sent across the miles in greeting cards. While for others, love is reserved and sometimes not returned. It’s felt but not spoken. A hug might convey it but is that the same?

According to Mum who is the Google of my family history, I was never a touchy-feely child. It wasn’t imposed upon me or expected. I was told I was loved but showed little desire to express the same emotions in return. It has taken me having my own children to realise how important it is for the life of my kids. Now 6 may just be a carbon copy of me but his brother, Dad and I will provide all the chances to show love that he needs.

For a life without love is no life at all.

Image from: here.

Love That Cheeky Monkey

20130512_101021Monkey love see; monkey love do.

Sometimes it’s naked and running free. At other times it’s shadowing me.

Wipe, powdered and soft as a baby’s; the fat rolls and wrinkles perfect in every way.

Naked from the waist down; jiggling as he runs with jocks upon his head and socks worn as mittens.

Bending over to look for a lizard that just made a dash; plumber’s crack facing up to the sky.

Making music in the bath; bum trumpet tune makes him cackle.

Built-in padding for accidents; falling flat on his arse stops him briefly.

Watch it wiggle and jiggle; dancing to the beat.

Nudie run to the shower; if I catch it, I’ll tickle it.

I’ve powdered, kissed, washed, tickled, dressed, wiped and watched that bum.

I’ve fussed over, worried, laughed and shaken my head at those little cheeks.

It may be responsible for a number of functions, some of which are the anti of cute.

But I made that bum.


No butts about it – love my little monkey.

Welcome to a new friend: Ann Marie Woolsey-Johnson — maternity peeve

From the gal who brought you The Filmonista, comes the heart-wrenching tale of an MFA, a baby and an unemployment check.

Ann Marie Woolsey-Johnson was once a designer, writer, teacher, gardener, and film critic.

In the early 2000s, she was a popular Vegas lounge singer.

Actually, that’s a lie… but, she is an above adequate piano player.

She’s now a stay-at-home mom, insomniac, crazy idiot neighbor, B vitamin junkie and chronic Facebook status updater.

And that’s okay with her.

Check out her once prestigious film blog:

via About | maternity peeve.

Every time I try to be June Cleaver, I end up like Joan Crawford.

June supervises the boys and their friends, To...

Birthdays really bring out the worst in me. It happens to be one of the few occasions during the year I actually look forward to. So much so, my unbridled enthusiasm ends up crushing my plans; and in some of the worst ways possible.

Today is my daughter’s 2nd birthday. Here’s a quick recap of how my celebratory endeavors turned ugly. Fast.

June Cleaver was my muse as I began the day by dressing my daughter up in some frilly pink clothing. (Truly out of character; I never dress her in pink clothing.) (Red flag #1.)

Mommie Dearest (film)

Dropping my daughter off at her school, I’m eager to get back to my kitchen to bake some cupcakes.

I never bake. (Red flag #2.)

Back in my kitchen, I’m zen as I assemble and combine my ingredients.

I’m never zen. And certainly NEVER in the kitchen. (Red Flag #3.)

I start to whistle. (Perhaps the biggest Red Flag of them all?)

I place my cupcakes in the oven to bake, and I wait. In what resembles a 1950s housewife type of Valium induced fog, I find myself in the bathroom actually trimming my cuticles with a cuticle remover.

I own such a tool? (Red Flag #4.)

English: Fairy cakes in an oven, taken from front.

English: Fairy cakes in an oven, taken from front. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Several minutes later (about 20 to be precise), I begin to smell baking soda and burning. Exit fog. Panicked; I begin thinking about how dirty my oven is, and my mind goes berserk. Have I cleaned it lately? If so, with what? Toxic chemicals? Did I use the self-cleaning option? Does that even WORK??

I feel my blood pressure spike; I have to bring these cupcakes to my daughter’s nursery school for a party in 45 minutes!

Borderline bonkers, I conduct a Google search on the heat of ovens and how they can vary from one to the next. I read that my oven is probably “normal” hot. Sigh. Thank you, Google. You are my church.

I breathe and then spot some sugar and flour on the counter near my blender; I missed a spot? I run to the cabinet and grab my trusty Method spray and take care of it, post haste!

The burning smell returns, this time accompanied by smoke and my detector’s alarm. I open the oven and see that the once happy, rising tops of my cupcakes have now fallen flat, hard and blackish. Oh, and I have about 3 minutes to cool and frost them.

I run into the bathroom again, flash blow dry my hair into a mangled frizz bomb, and sprint back into the kitchen; helpless but bound and determined to salvage at least five cupcakes

Note: This is where a rational woman would stop and admit defeat, head to the store and pick up an alternative. HA! Not this delusional momma.

My daughter and her friends will have cupcakes; even if they are burned, damnit…  and they’ll like them!

English: A Small tupperware container.

I place everything in Tupperware, and I’m off!

Just as I aggressively pull the door shut, I spot my keys on the table (about 8 feet away from me). SLAM. Locked out.

It’s pouring rain.

As good luck in bad situations would have it; I spot an umbrella on my porch. I grab it with force and anger; my mind quickly fleets to the image of Mommie Dearest grabbing a handful of her daughter’s hair as she screams; “SCRUB, Christina… SCRUUUHB!”

I begin speed walking to my daughter’s school, zig-zagging around puddles like a mime (I neglected to mention, I’m wearing the thinnest sandals I own), trying not to drop two awkwardly balanced Tupperware containers full of charred cupcakes. Smiling at passing cars, crying, and then, eventually laughing myself back into that lovely fog.



“When are you guys having the next one?”

And like clockwork…sign it happened.

20 mos post-first born, in fact, just as all my friends said it would. The first time I heard it, I was completely caught off guard. In my kitchen (my home, my comfort zone), I was approached from the rear by a friend of the family.


The sound of that lone syllable echoing in my head was enough to keep me turned around at the sink; chin tucked into my neck just enough to show I was listening, but intent on getting the dishes clean.

I knew what was coming; we just had an enjoyable dinner complete with all the “oohs” and “ahhhs” that accompany a family gathering where a toddler is the highlight of the evening.

“When are you guys having the next one?”

There are so many things wrong with this statement, beginning with the presumptive “when?”.

How about the word; “next”? I mean, just how many are we talking about here? Four? Five? Furthermore, when does this “when?” end?

My answer; one that’s been rehearsed over and over since even before my first (and ONLY) child was a concept:

“Oh no, just one for us. One is more than enough.” Big fake smile.

<Small, very real rage>.

Why so angry? I thought you’d never ask! Please, let me list these reasons in bullet points for you– in fact, why don’t I choose asterisks instead? Asterisks are ornamental… friendly and less likely to be used by someone on a war path to prove a point, right?

* My husband and I are not breeders.  True, we’ve got some killer genes to pass on, but unless you’d like to talk about a surrogate offer, we will stand behind our word, thank you very much.

* We enjoy our nightly couch time.

* I like having time to blow dry my hair. It’s a priority. Sue me.

* Believe it or not, we actually WANT to spoil our child.

* We’re not a baby factory for our parents. We get it; our folks want grand kids. But guess what?  They have other children they can harass.

* We do not care to make our friends who have multiples feel better about their situation by having several of our own. We love you, but it’s your problem you have no time to: shower for more than 3 minutes, eat dinner in peace without being the target of an Ella’s Kitchen Squash Broccoli puree boomerang, and catch-up on Mad Men. I cry for you, really… I do.

If you approach me with this question, be prepared for my canned response. But please know, I will be more than happy to show you to the door if you press me for more information. And if you ask me in public, there’s a good chance I might throw a scalding hot cup of coffee directly at your face and run screaming “I need an adult!!”

Give Me My Check Now | Ramblings From an Apathetic Adult Baby

This experience has been highly objectionable and I want it to end as soon as possible. I’ve watched this waitress saunter about the restaurant,

Toots Schultz

Toots Schultz (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

feigning laughter and genuine interest in customers’ stories while permitting that smallest of small talk to gush out of her dolled-up face socket. Yes, Toots, that’s right, your overly-projected conversation about it raining two days in aEnglish: Logo of Universal Church Triumphant o...

row is not fascinating to anyone. It’s odd to make a point of something being unremarkable, but that quip was not conversation-worthy in the slightest. You’ve exhibited a blatantly offensive lack of self-awareness when you didn’t even hesitate before launching into that monotonous monologue. Initially, I thought it might be an isolated incident, but not three minutes later you started in on a tirade about your mild dislike of lentils. Honestly, everyone’s life’s too short to listen to that. 

Release me from this tediously droning waking terror and bring me my check. I know I don’t like you, but you can be my angel and set me free.

via Give Me My Check Now | Ramblings From an Apathetic Adult Baby.

Photo journey | Life and Photos by Andy

Photo journey

May 21, 2013 · by photosbyandy · in Manblogs, Uncategorized. ·

I’m reposting this as an amendment to my About page.

This blog will be about my adventures with photography and life. I’m always inspired by natures beauty, and I will be my best to share that with you. I have recently been, venitian tower flatusing a Cannon Rebel XT EOS, its a very basic DSL camera. I am still in an Amateur when it comes to picture taking. However I feel that I have an eye for good pictures, imageand I have recently discovered a new favorite quote by Alfred Stieglitz “It is the eye that takes the picture, not the camera.”

When I first started this journey I found myself using Photoshop quite a bit., to make my pictures better. As my picture taking journey has progressed these past months I have been using Photoshop less and less, because my picture taking kills have improved. I’m still not there yet, but its getting there. Thank you all for following my journey.

I will also be sharing some of my life experiences as a husband and father. I have two wonderful daughters and the past few months I have had the privilege to be a Stay At Home Dad. Since this summer I have had to take over the house hold duties, since my wife is working full time. My cooking skills have VASTLY improved, which has greatly surprised my wife. After eight years of marriage I have still find ways to surprise my wife. I can only hope this continues for the years to come.

My wife will also be making the occasional guest blog appearances, about her experiences as mommy and wife.

Rio Grande River

via Photo journey | Life and Photos by Andy.

Welcome to a new friend: Taylor Oceans | Playing Your Hand Right

My Life

Anyone who can’t admit to a mistake hasn’t learned from it yet

So here is my story. I’ve sold, grown, and distributed drugs. Bought and sold sex. Abandoned those I loved when they were in need, and been abandoned by those I loved. I’ve pushed away those who loved me and called the scum of the earth friend and business partner. I’ve saved lives and contributed to the deaths of others. And not just strangers, those I called family. I’m not trying to justify my actions at the time I thought they were necessary. I will have to atone for my sins as we all do and not in a biblical sense. If you can’t live with yourself and what you have done you will never be happy. Am I a villain? I have been. Am I a hero? No, but I have done some great things. But isn’t that the duality of man.

So I guess I’ll start at the beginning. I was born in 1985 and like many in my generation I was raised to be a man by a woman. My Dad abandoned us when I was a child and the first memory is my sister holding me on the stairs telling me if it will be fine. I don’t know if that was the night he left I was to young but I learned the hard lesson that sometimes it will not be alright. I don’t really remember meeting my Dad when he came back, but I do remember knowing he was my Father as soon as I saw him.

My mother, sister, and I lived on the farm I was born on for four years. She worked as a secretary and lets say we were the bottom of the income bracket. Again I was too young to remember this but I heard stories of the three of us sleeping in the same bed by the fire place to keep warm. The house was built in the late 1800′s and was insulated by horse hair and newspaper. You could feel the breeze coming through the walls and windows. Nothing is as cold as that house in winter. My mother had to chop the wood since I was three, and my big sister was eight. Mom always told stories of this old man Henry who worked for my grandparents and would come by to help chop wood. According to my mother he kept us from freezing to death because anyone who has lived in a house that is heated by wood knows it takes literally a ton, on a regular basis.

We moved to a village about an hour from my farm to a house that, to say the least was a royal piece of shit. It had a hole in the front porch five feet by five feet with a board over it to cross so you could get into the front door. The kitchen plumbing was an engine hose, and it was heated by wood and the oldest oil heater imaginable. We called it home and started to fix it up. I will say that I was given the eye to see things for what they can be instead of the shit they normally are. I painted the walls from the floor to three feet high, my sister did the next two feet and my mother painted to the ceiling doing the ladder work. By now my mother who is really a genius (and not a Kanye West genius a real one) had started her own business in management consulting. Do you know how hard it is to get away with anything as a kid when your mother is a genius? She could have seen a spec of dirt on my shoes and told me what part of the swamp I was playing in instead of doing my homework. Ever seen the show Monk? She is that good without all the weird quarks.

So she was supporting us on her own with a little help from my sister’s dad’s child support. My Dad was not around. One week a month she would have to go on business and the coolest black woman would take care of us. I say that in retrospect at the time I’m sure I hated her she made me eat my veggies, but mom always said, and I believed it, that if the house was on fire she would have come out with me under one arm my sister under her other arm and hair on fire.

My mother married her third husband when I was seven years old, about the same time my dad came back. My dad moved on to the farm that I grew up on, and me my sister and my mother moved in with my new step dad and his three children. When they divorced I was 18 and I decided to move in with my dad who had just been diagnosed with HIV. I wanted to live with him to get to know him before he died. My mother taking this decision badly decided to move to Canada where she resides to this day. I lived with my dad and went to art school which were the best years of my life. I was a great student a great worker and an even better boyfriend. My life was going exactly where I wanted it to go and I was happy right up to the point where SWAT kicked in my door and threw me out of college. Damn marijuana Laws. At the same time my father’s condition was greatly deteriorating. I spent the next year trying to take care of my dad as best as a 20-year-old could do. Tragically my dad did not want to live and he stopped taking his medication. I couldn’t watch my dad slowly dying of AIDS in front of me so I ran away to the big city two and a half hours from my farm. I only saw my dad a few more times during most of which we fought until I get a call one night saying he is slipped into a coma and will be dead by morning. I went home to smoke weed, drink scotch and listen to Tom Petty with him for the last time. I had to blow the smoke in his face, use my fingers to put some scotch on his lips, which funny enough he quickly licked up; some of the last movements he ever made. He was dead in six hours.  What they dont tell you about AIDS is that you go crazy before you die my Dad wrote me out of the will.  I lost my Dad and the farm on the same day.  I lost my mind and my will to live and decided to try to get killed selling cocaine in the murder capital of America. I made half a million in two years.  Tragically I wasted it all on drugs, lap dances, my friends, ridiculous bar tabs exceeding ten grand in one night and the greatest BBQs by the river every day free for everyone of course.  You don’t really save when you expect to be killed at any moment.  When my partner was gunned down in a drive-by I decided to retire. I was ashamed when I looked in the mirror and I resolve to change. I decided to start my journey to become a gentleman.   Please enjoy my book Playing Your Hand Right: Tales of a Gentleman  a collection of my triumphs  my failures, and some other funny shit.

via My Life | Playing Your Hand Right.


I’ve tried to inspire all of you to better yourselves and to realize that it is never to late to change. Everyday you make a choice to better yourself, be a good person or stagnate, regress, and corrupt. I’ve been there. I watched my dad die in front of me. He went from 256 pounds to 98, in four years. Then turned grey, slipped into a coma and died six hours later. On top of this I lost my home, was thrown out of school for weed forever killing dreams of being an artist. I lost it all turned to crime as an income and maybe an easy way out of this horrible life I found myself in. Alone in a dank down town apartment. One day I decided to live. To get my boat and get on with living. To have sex with fifteen chicks on that boat and sail around the world so many times I forget how many times. Now I write. Any day I feel like taking the easy way; picking up the phone and making deals to get my boat or maybe just eating a bullet. I remember Zach. He is my new touchstone for I guess a year now. Life can always be worst. Life changes like the tides and the winds, but the trick is to be happy with what you have. To hold your dreams tightly but let go lightly. Have a nice day disciples and try to make the right choice today. I did.

Work-at-Home Obstacle #1: Family, Pets and Friends | Self-Published Authors Helping Other Authors





ArticlesAfter my last post’s mention of some of the obstacles I run into working at home, I had someone (who does not wish for me to name them) ask me how I get any work done at home as a writer. This is a four-part series and I thought I would start with one of the biggest obstacle that writers run into: children, family, pets, and friends who demand or disturb you while you are working.

ArticlesThere is nothing more annoying than talking to a client or taking a business call and have a child or spouse interrupt you, or have the cat jump on the keyboard and send an email before your done, or be in the moment, typing out that story for all your worth and have a child demand you help them with something. Or the biggest one at my house, my hubby wanting me to see something on the Tele or help him with something, not because he needs the help, just because he wants to company.


Friends (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

There is nothing as potentially harmful to your productivity then having your sweet child crawl into your lap for love, having to deal with a sick animal, or friends calling wanting your to hang out and go to lunch. So how do I work around this obstacle?

, writer for numerous series, including Happy ...

I’m honest with my family and friends. Explain to them that this is your job. Talk to your family and friends about what you do. Don’t get discouraged if they don’t understand, most people who aren’t writers don’t. Tell them that this is how you make, or will be making, your money for your future. Even if it’s just a supplemental income right now, this is your business and should be treated as such.

this is considered in public domain now becaus...

this is considered in public domain now because its copyright condition has been already expired in Iran. according to the “National law in support of authors, composers and artists” ratified in 01/01/1970 and published in 01/02/1970, the license for photographs and films after their issuing date is valid for 30 years. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

chedule my time. I’m not one for schedules but I’m learning to schedule time to get my ranch chores done, meals prepared, and house clean. I schedule in time to be with my darling kids and lovely spouse. I schedule my writing hours. I schedule my book design hours. I schedule time to read emails (early morning before the eldest heads to school) and time to answer them (before I end work for the day). I schedule time to hang out with friends. Read the rest….


via Work-at-Home Obstacle #1: Family, Pets and Friends | Self-Published Authors Helping Other Authors.


Waiting for the Answer | You By My Side

Waiting for the Answer

13 Monday May 2013

Posted by aimi in LOVE

telephone worry couple

Well… in an hour or two… I will find out what M’s parent think of us getting married… because M is going to bring up the topic to his parents… since our plan is to get engaged in June. My parents … i mean my dad doesn’t know our plan but my mom knows that we are planing to get married.

I am not sure what normal in this process of … expressing intention to marry in Japanese culture or any other culture but…. it is pretty pretty…well.. big deal to the next step of our relationship…if we want to have a marriage that is accepted by both of our parents.

Time is ticking…. It makes me nervous…

via Waiting for the Answer | You By My Side.


Welcome to a new friend: charl1010 HELP! I AM AN UNWANTED CHILD,ABUSED AND ABANDONED

myself Charlene and sons  Alexander & Vincent 001 - Copy

The worst night mares that I had in my life was being sabotaged by family members starting from the parents who denied me since the day I was born and I gotten hurt by a number of surprised, extreme hatred and too much fright and the villainous and bias hate crimes that was done to me for several years to the point to where the so called mother and father deliberately brain washed me and they both misled me from the very start and the mother, they pulled me out of school from my kindergarten class and I was shift off to 949 W Huron and I found myself on my need all bend over while a male was on me behind me and that was very inappropriate touching and that happened in the grandmother’s home and this happened when I was taken out of my kindergarten class room and I never got to complete kindergarten at all. and I was kept out of school until I returned back to school at age 7.5 years old and I had to start all over again and I was nearly 3 years behind in grade school and I got picked on and bullied in grade school and high school they set me up for nothing I did not even do to none of them people at all. I was taken to where people did drink and gotten drunk and leaving kids behind that was very wrong and very dangerous because I was taken to where I was used by the adults all my whole entire life and they made me a family,and a people scapegoat too. They controlled my life, and they RESTRICTED MY PERSONAL FREEDOM AND THE FAMILY PEOPLE DID FOLLOW ME EVERYWHERE I MOVED TO RIGHT BEHIND MY BACK FOR SEVERAL YEARS AND NOW TO THE PRESENT DECADES AND YES I’M TALKING THIS YEAR 2013 AND I DON’T HAVE ANY MONEY TO RETIRE ON. I was hurt by the offense and several life threatening situations and the gossip and the ambush, and entrapment that was not nice the way they treated me like an outcast and an outsider. ALL THE PEOPLE IN THIS FAMILY DO NOT LIKE PEOPLE WITH ALBINISM. THE PEOPLE IN THIS DAMN FAMILY DO GOT SOMETHING AGAINST PEOPLE WITH ALBINISM, PLEASE PEOPLE DO BE AWARE OF THIS, THAT IS VERY DANGEROUS AND IT IS VERY CRIMINAL AND VERY WRONG TO TREAT ANY PEOPLE LIKE THAT.


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