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50 Shades of me Welcome to a new friend: Darkyblue

DARKYBLUE

A LITTLE ABOUT ME

I started this blog because I have been writing poems since I was about ten years old. I have never shown them to anyone as I was ashamed of who I was because of how others treated me and made me feel. They were sort of a diary really of how I was feeling at that time in my life.

I’ve suffered depression since childhood and although there is a lot of darkness in my life, there is also a beautiful light in the form of friends to which I owe my life to and love dearly.

I’m sharing my writing because, at 46, I think it’s time for me to take the next step to my recovery and allow people to see the “real” me.

I read them often to remind myself of how far I have come since that frightened little child and smile to myself because I never thought that I could come this far.

If I can make someone smile or feel better about themselves then my day would not have been wasted.

Be kind to others as you never know the burdens they carry.

Please feel free to comment on anything I have written. I’d love to know your thoughts
xx

via A LITTLE ABOUT ME | 50 Shades of me.

I can see through ya

Pour me another drink, cos I tell ya
I’m gonna run away and not run to ya
Had enough of this crap I don’t want it
I realise I don’t need you one bit

Never again will I be your fool
So tell me now whatcha gonna do
How could you ever have been so cruel
You just flaunted all the rules

I haven’t always been this way
I can remember when I was ok
You watched as the darkness came
And took the best of me away

So pour me another drink, cos I tell ya
I’m gonna run away and not run to ya
Had enough of this crap I don’t want it
I realise I don’t need you one bit

Sometimes I question “am I dead”
Fighting doubts within my head
Trust me I’ve been in worse places
I don’t need you and your two faces

So step aside and let me through
Cos honey, I am leaving you
Because at last I can see the light
And I can see through all your lies

An so pour me another drink, cos I tell ya
I’m gonna run away and not run to ya
Had enough of this crap I don’t want it
I realise I don’t need you one bit

Under the bed

Don’t worry sweetheart
My nanny would say
When she tucked me in
At the end of each day

There are no monsters
To harm you in the night
Cos the monsters that hurt you
They walk in plain sight

They could be those we live with
That you’d think were no threat
Or the lovers we hope for
That we haven’t met yet

So just close your eyes
And dream some sweet dreams
While you’re safe in your bed
Where the monsters ain’t real

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