In love with the idea of being in love
JD Selmser is the dreamer who traveled 8000 miles by plane then 500 miles by train just for a kiss and the possibility of love only for it to not be the one. (Hard to believe when I finally found her she was only 300 miles away). He is the guy who searches for magical sunsets, waterfalls and believes in true love, soul mates and kisses that take your breath away, with the support of his true soul mate. Eventually, inevitably, he ended up writing about romance and those things that go bump in the night. JD also loves animals and can be seen walking with his little dog Spazz, building model ships and searching for a new place in the world to discover.
Sarah decided that she did not want to work outside the house, but wanted to do freelance writing from home so that she could spent more time at home with the mini me. Now I am pretty open and supportive to this idea. I have always thought that a woman’s place in the home and relationship is exactly where she feels the most fulfilled no matter where it is. Sarah truly had the choice to just stay home or work full or part time. When I see how happy she is and how happy Wyatt is I know that she made the right choice.
Sarah has this idea that I am supporting her, but this is one of the few points that we do not see eye to eye. For me I see it as she is doing what’s best for our lives and our family. Who makes the money or how much less we make a month is not nearly as important as the fact that we have a happy family. Our kids do not see arguing or fighting, but they see two happy parents in love. Wyatt is an extremely bright and happy baby. Even though we had an absolutely amazing baby sitter, but she was not mom to our little bundle of joy. I can go to work and not worry about the little one. He is chatting as most babies are and I know that Sarah talks to him, she encourages him and as a mother is supposed to she adores him. That is absolutely priceless.
The other day I was watching Dr Phil and there was a couple who made a similar choice. Honestly I was ashamed to be the gender as the guy. He seemed to look at the most important job a parent can do as more of sacrifice then an honor. When a man looks at the loss of income as a sacrifice rather than well-being of his family he has to re-evaluate his priorities. Sacrifice to me means sacrifice which is a cost that comes with regret. The well-being of my wife is family no matter what the requirement is not sacrifice that comes with regrets, but an honor.
My parent’s life was a lot simpler in a way because they knew that the needs of the family are more important than the extras. I cannot speak for the rest of you, but for too long I bought way too many extras. Not at the expense of the family’s needs, but definitely not things that I needed. I think as a culture we need to always remember that needs and wants are not the same. We need food, shelter and love, but a new cell phone, a faster laptop or 500 cable channels are wants not needs.
I want to end this with one final thought. The common house wife is the one that makes care of the house, guides their children and deserves all the acknowledgement and praise for the outstanding work they do. You can never judge accomplishments, importance or pride based on dollar and cents because money does not last forever ,but family will because your actions today will help guide who the generations after are and can be.
Also we have four kids so if I was at home I think some days there would be at least three kids duct taped to a wall.
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After a few requests to post more I decided to post a few more chapters of my book “Little White Lies”
Chapter Two – A mystery of sorts
I waited around and once visiting hours were over, I left. There were a lot more questions in my mind now, than when I arrived. First question I had amongst the long list was, who Stacey was and did I give her this book? Why had I written that letter? More secrets from the past, that’s all my life really was. I followed the motions pretending to be the man I used to be, but there were always more and more little secrets. As I left the building I must have been deep in thought as I never heard the clapping of high heels on the pavement behind me until she was just a few steps away. As I turned and looked there was Maria standing there mouth half open like she had something to say, but couldn’t put the words together.
From my jacket pocket I grabbed a cigarette and fought the wind to light it. As soon as the smoke hit the air, she curled her nose and just stared at me. I took the hint and tossed it aside. I know it’s a filthy habit and I have been trying to quit for years, but it’s one of my many weaknesses. She had this apologetic look in her eyes and muttered, “Mr. Skuce you did not have to stop smoking on my account.”